My Life as an Experiment

Bah Humbug

Or words to that effect, anyway.

I’ve only got a minute, so this, like the last one, will be brief.  Big surprise, right?  You know where the complaint box is… —->>>>>>

Anyway.  My eyes… well, they’re still functional, if a bit challenged now.  I don’t drive often at night anymore, though can/will if I really have to.  I have blurring issues here and there, and trouble focusing on details that I could easily focus on just three or four months ago.  Reading, one of my favorite things, is a bit harder now (sometimes flat out impossible).  It all fluctuates, as this lovely genetic disease hasn’t quite decided on how it’s going to progress or how far it’s going to go.  I have a moderately large occlusion in my left eye… not like a solid block, but a grey/blurry area.  I can see through it, but it’s distorted, like there’s mist covering that spot in my eye.  The disease is called LHON (Leber’s Hereditary Optic Neuropathy), or Leber’s Optic Atrophy.  As of now, I’m waiting on DNA testing to confirm the diagnosis, but Mom has it, and women always pass it on to their children, whereas men NEVER pass it on to their children.  Nice, right?  Anyway.  Just having the gene doesn’t mean one will go blind, as some people simply carry it in a dormant state, never having any effect on their vision.  My sister and my niece, for example.  But then there’s the VERY small part of the gene-bearing population that the gene chooses to go active in.  It appears that I’ll be one of those, although the specialists I’ve seen are still reluctant to commit to that.  They give me lots of ‘Well, we’re PRETTY sure that’s what you’ve got’, and ‘Well, we’ve eliminated all the other possibilities with the tests we just did’, but they still dance away from committing to ‘This IS what is wrong with your eyes.’  Typical men… allergic to commitment.  So overall, it’s a giant basket of WOOT!

*insert ‘you’ve got to be fucking kidding me’ face here*

Anyway.  I’m alive, still functional, and trying to figure everything out.  Maybe the eye thing won’t get any worse.  Maybe it will render me completely blind.  I have no way of knowing, and neither do the doctors.  I do love uncertainties.  Either way, I’ll probably remain the smartass that we all know and love.  The world would probably fall right off its axis if I tried to be anything else.  Natural order of things, you know.

And now I get to go fight the unwashed masses for last minute Christmas shopping needs.  I know, I know… should have done it earlier, blah blah blah.  Bite me.  I’m going to go staple some spikes on my boots, grab a sock with a few rolls of quarters dropped down in it, and head to the mall.  It’s really the only way to handle this situation.  You have a better idea?

Ho ho ho.

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