Or at least pretend to. Those of you that feared for my sanity will be pleased to note that I have reconsidered my original position and am no longer throwing myself in front of the home-building bus. I am, instead, going to buy a home that was just built. Saves wear and tear on my emotional/mental state.
And keeps me from having to shoot someone.
Things were just going from bad to worse with the whole building situation. Between people not being able to remember what the word 'punctual' means (Is it so fucking hard to say Wednesday and MEAN Wednesday, as opposed to a week from FRIDAY? For fuck's sake, what are you trying to do... give me an ANEURYSM?), and the costs going up to the point of equaling the gross national product of Uganda, it just seemed better to take advantage of the monstrously shitty real estate market and snatch up a house that is already built and being sold at a huge loss.
I found one!
The house I found is, in reality, a $300,000 house. (That's in MY market, which is way cheaper than places like California or London or whatever. The mind boggles at what I'd pay for the house in one of those places.) But I'm getting it for WAY less. Oodles, really. And I couldn't be happier, both with the investment value of the house and the house itself, in a strictly 'oh my GOD, look at that KITCHEN!' kind of way. 'Cause seriously? The kitchen rocks my socks. The furry ones I wear around the house. Neon green, even. Aren't I festive?
Where was I? (...)
Oh, the house. It's about 2300 square feet, three car garage, four bedroom, two bath, tons of hardwood flooring, big master bedroom suite with a ginormous Jacuzzi corner tub in the master bath, blah blah blah. I wish the yard was a little bigger, but it's not horrible. I'm supposed to meet with my realtor today to go through and do a punch list on the house. After I do that, and get it inspected and all, I'll post pictures. I'm not going to post pictures and then find out that there's actually a herd of rabid gnomes living in my crawl space, hence rendering the pictures useless and sending me on another hunt for a house since, well... no one wants to live with rabid gnomes. Nasty bastards.
I know I've been derelict in my posting duties, even more so than usual, but the long and short of it is that there's been a lot of drama here at home. I know, I know... you're astounded. Try to absorb the shock. Breathe. But yes, it's true... yours truly has been communing with her personal black cloud. It was, by all appearances, bored out of its skull and decided to spice things up. It's been fun. Getting your arm caught in a wood chipper kind of fun. Nipples gnawed off by plague-infected rats kind of fun. Jonestown kind of fun.
Aren't I just one for the imagery?
Well, I have 800 things to do over the next three days. We're going on vacation Sunday and you know how entertaining it is to prepare for vacation. Just think wood chipper.
Don't pity me... SEDATE ME.
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